Empress Sassy

posted by EmpressSassy on May 27

We hung our patio lights last night. Well, we hung them in our canopy that we have set up on the patio and I cleaned up all the patio furniture to get ready for the holiday weekend.  We had new lights this year; butterflies and fireflies and they were quite festive if I do say so myself.  We did the big light up and I got the official approval from Noah that they were hung perfectly! 

I love the beginning of summer when the weather is cool in the mornings and the evenings.  I love getting the yard ready for grilling and hanging out in the yard.   Noah has his new play set this year and hopefully we can hang out a lot more this year around the house grillin’ and just chillin’!  I love to grill supper; it makes it so much easier at night to just grill out and eat under the canopy.  It’s less mess and much easier for Noah to just play outside while I get things ready.  We have our basic recipes; burgers and dogs and then we have our specialties – chicken burritos! Do you have a favorite grilling recipe you want to share?  If so put it out here! 

I can’t wait to start playing our hillbilly golf and corn hole again this year.  We were so busy last year that we didn’t get to hang out much, but I’m vowing to stay home more this year and do the back yard thing!  Noah likes to be at home and it’s just nice to hang out and do things with the family.   

Hope everybody has a great holiday weekend and enjoys the super, summer weather!  Make sure you go outside and enjoy the unofficial start of summer! 

posted by EmpressSassy on May 25

What does your IPod say about you?  If someone found your IPod and began to search through it what would they think about the mystery owner?  Do you think they could they easily target you as a head-banger, classic musical lover, or country lover only?  Would they have no idea because you are so diverse? 

Mine would be fairly easy to decipher I think; I have everything from country to hard rock all the way to Fisher Price music from when Noah was little.  Mine screams average mom that has a wide variety of music choices from her past and present.  Although I don’t go past the last 90’s much.  I don’t like today’s new music much except select, new songs as they come out by various artists. 

I also have songs on my IPod that I don’t really like so some people might think they have things in common with me, when in reality I’m just too lazy to delete the songs!  I guess they could check my recently played section or my play list to really get to know me right?

I just wonder if you could really tell something about that person’s personality just by viewing their IPod.  I have movies saved too so that might help with getting to know me too.  Just a thought I had today when I had my music on shuffle; it was cracking me up going from Run DMC to Tom Jones!  Sort of all over the board with my music taste, but that is just me. 

Music is a big part of some folk’s personality; at least in my world anyway.  It would be fun to view random IPods to see if you could guess some things about that person’s personality and see how close you come to being correct.

posted by EmpressSassy on May 17

It’s an argument of the ages; our mothers ironed everything from sheets to undergarments.  Our children don’t want to iron anything.  We are somewhere in the middle.  What is the answer?

I have been wishy-washy on this subject depending on my mood of course or the attitude of my time restraints, but at the end of my reflections of life I have to make my statement - clothes need to be ironed.

Now I’m not talking all crazy about sheets, undergarments and even casual shorts or clothes you are going to wear when you plan to wash the car, but if you are going to wear it to work, church, school, social gathering then you need to iron it.  People in ironed clothes just look nicer and more presentable.

Now, my niece is reading this right now and she is just thinking to herself, “no this is not the way of life anymore.”  Well it is if you want to look nice and present yourself in a clean and presentable manner.

I was recently at a meeting where 5 - 6 individuals stood in front of me speaking to a group of people.  5 of these individuals looked very professional, cleaned up, ironed clothes and very professional.  One person stood up there to talk in a shirt that looked as if it had been slept in, pants that had been rolled in a ball and this person stood out like a sore thumb.  It does make a statement.  The whole time all I could think was, “Seriously, if you are THAT busy can’t you drop your stuff off at the dry cleaners?” 

Again, you don’t have to iron it all, but at least try to iron the things you will wear in public.  Also think of your children and how they will look during a show at school or in front of a large group of kids. 

To iron or not to iron that is the question. My response is PRESS ON and just let out some steam with the process!

posted by EmpressSassy on May 11

Dr. James Dobson has a new book that has just come out called “Bringing up Girls”.  I haven’t read it yet, but I will order it soon.  I’m not raising a girl, but I read his book “Bringing up Boys” and it was awesome. It was recommended by my cousin and I’m so glad she told me to read it.   If you have a girl I highly suggest you order this book and read it as soon as possible.

I can’t imagine raising a girl in today’s environment; it was tough enough 15 years ago when my daughter was a teenager and things have progressively gotten worse based on the stories I hear from mothers of teenage girls.

I think what has changed is the world of technology and the ability for communication to take place between the opposite sex.  What has not changed of course is the need for this communication and the desire to be together; this was and still is as strong as it was in the 1700’s.  Girl wants boy and boy will be with girl no matter what; this is a fact.  It’s just what happens in between that causes all the issues.  Cell phones and laptops make it so easy for teens to communicate quickly and quietly without parental supervision.  Children have access to these devices at a much to earlier age.  They begin the dialogue immediately with the opposite sex and it leads to avenues they are not ready to deal with at their age level.

If and when your child does make any kind of mistake with the opposite sex it begins a series of thoughts; I’m to blame, my child is to blame, is it environment, where did it all go wrong?  Sometimes there is so much emphasis spent on the blame that we don’t focus enough on moving forward to fix the problem at hand.  It has taken me a long time to get to a good place in my life and sadly I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way.  I’ve learned you can’t have regrets; life is too short.  You can only move forward and make you present and future better and learn from your past. 

I firmly believe in the teaching of Noah’s school that a child can solidly learn from the triangle of spirituality.  If a child knows he has a solid base around him at school/home/church then he/she will have a solid base and feel secure and loved.  So often I know I falter at home thinking school and church will “cover the basis” and that is not good enough.  Not to say we don’t believe at home, but I become relaxed in thinking he gets it enough from the other areas and again, that is not good enough.  I wish someone would have taught me this as a young parent 25 years ago. 

A child learns by example and that is the best form of learning.  If a child sees you believing, doing and setting the bar high, they will want to do the same. Keeping a promise, telling the truth, remaining calm, thinking it through, making the good choices, being fair, sharing, etc.  All things that as an adult we don’t always do, but to a child are huge, daily options. 

Remember if your child falters, makes a mistake, loses their way, you are not alone.  Others have been in this arena and can help.  Seek their help, whether it be professional or just a friend you can talk to about it.  Don’t try to deal with it alone.  Stress only makes a bad situation worse.  Kids have been the same since the 1700’s and I imagine they will remain the same through eternity.  Remember the triangle and hopefully it will give you the strength you need for your family.

posted by EmpressSassy on May 11

When someone tells you to “be the bigger person” this basically mean they want you to give in or get over the current situation at hand.  What it is truly supposed to mean is that you are to take the high road and show the other person that you can do this; you can be stronger, wiser, ever more refined if you will.  You are telling the other person you will not stoop to their level and you will no longer allow yourself to be this ugly person because you are better than the current situation this person has drug you into at the present moment. 

In my family, sadly it means someone wants you to give in to the bigger baby or drama queen that is acting up at that particular moment.  I get so tired of being told to be the bigger person.  How does that fix anything?  How many times are you the bigger person before you realize that all this does mean is that you gave in, you lost your way and the other person got their way?  If I truly thought the other person would see it as a moment of exceptional behavior on my part and actually acknowledge said behavior with a thank you or a compliment I might actually be the bigger person once in a while.  This never happens.  The only thing that happens is that they get their way and life moves on with me looking like a chump.

Life in a family pretty much is like life in customer service; the person that yells the loudest or complains the loudest to upper management a.k.a. parents get their way.  The trickle down effect is just the lecture to the employees/children telling you to step up and do the right thing whether you agree or not.  Why is this fair?  It’s not just in case you want to know the truth.

It has nothing to do with the oldest, middle or youngest child; it has to do with doing the right thing and playing fair within the guidelines of a family.  I don’t think the one with the most drama or tears should acquire the apology or the attention every time.  It’s almost like the stronger you are the less you are allowed to be heard.  Again, you are told, “be the bigger person” because you can handle the aftermath and the stress.  Why is this fair to a strong personality type? 

At the end of the day “being the bigger person” just means giving in to a family member that has either used their drama to get their way or the vote is in from the majority that you have to give in to “keep the peace” regardless of your feelings in the matter.  Why is it that one person’s feelings are less valuable than another person’s feelings?  In life this is not how conflicts should be resolved. 

posted by EmpressSassy on May 10

I hope all the mothers out there had a lovely Mother’s Day!  I had a super day and spent it at the movie’s with Noah so that made it nice.  I had a double dose of church this weekend, but that’s OK.  We did out church Saturday afternoon and then Sunday morning with Mom. 

It was a gorgeous day outside and we even played outside for a bit riding the scooter so all in all it was just a lovely day.   The sermon at our service was really good and it talked about how it takes a village to raise a child.  His interpretation to that is really it takes a spiritual congregation to raise a child, not just a village of people. 

Children need to be surrounded by a strong, spiritual group of people and the more that happens the more the influence will effect them in their lives.  This is so true and it is something to strive for in your life.  The more negativity you can cut of of your life the better.  Children don’t  need to have stress in their young lives and they need to grow up in a world where decisions should be strong and back by spiritual thinking.  They should not be influenced by negativity, peer pressure or opinions that don’t matter.

Women have such an important role in a child’s life.  Mothers, Aunts, Grandmas, cousins, teachers, coaches can all teach a child from a positive approach and let them know they can achieve anything in their sights.  If they want it then it’s obtainable.  Women are strong and can show this to their child through love, responsibility and the most important thing; EXAMPLE. 

Happy Mother’s Day not just on the Holiday, but every day.  You are a mother every, single day.  Teach them every, single day to go after want they want out of life!

posted by EmpressSassy on May 4

We were driving to school this morning and I had asked Noah a question.  It wasn’t a mind boggling question, but he replied, “Can I think about it?”  I replied, “Well sure you can sweetie, you can just let me know later.”  He sat there for a minute and then he told asked me if I ever thought about things.  I told him sure, I thought about things and he then told me he thinks about things all the time since he’s older (being 5 and all he is older).  He said he thinks a lot.  I told him that was good because the more you think, the better chance you have of making a good decision about things.  He smiled and said he agreed and he told me he liked to think about things.

After I dropped him off at school and I was driving to work I couldn’t help think about our conversation.  Wow, 5 and he’s telling me he thinks all the time.  It just seems a little deep for a 5 year old, but maybe not, things have changed and kids are different.  I can’t even remember being 5, but maybe he’s just talking.

You can’t help but worry about little ones; what they think, see, know, worry about and feel in their little lives.  As you get older it makes you want to do things better, stronger, easier and all for them.   As you get older you also realize life is about giving to them and less to yourself to make sure they have that security.  A secure, happy child is everything. 

Noah is a happy child; he laughs, plays, uses his imagination, jokes, interacts with all ages and loves life.  He has bad days too; but we all do, but the point is a child’s life should be happy and easy going and they shouldn’t have to think about bad things, sad things, stressful things or anything that makes them unhappy.  Parents have a responsibility to maintain a healthy environment for their children.  If you brought them into this world they are a gift from God and you should treasure this gift. 

The news is filled with missing children, abused children, neglected children and I can’t accept it or wrap my mind around how a person can do this to a child.  How a parent, especially can do this to a child.  How selfish must a person be to take out your issues on a child?  Selfishness is just a crime.  If you are a parent, giving is natural.  It should just come natural without hesitation.  It should never cross your mind to sacrifice for your child.  NEVER. 

We are the ones that should be thinking; all the time so our children don’t have to worry, stress or think about the big things.  We should also remember to “check in” with our little ones and just ask what they are thinking about from time to time.  It never hurts to check because you may just be surprised by their answers!

posted by EmpressSassy on Apr 30

For those of you that have cats; you will totally get this entry.  If you don’t, well then it will probably seal the deal to make you want to purchase a hamster!  I’m convinced that cats throw up on purpose.  Now, I know from dog lovers that dogs chew things because they are just stupid and curious.  They have a need to chew and once they do and it’s in their stomach it has to come back out - I get this.

Cats don’t really do this, they don’t chew.  OK, well my yellow, demon cat eats curly ribbon, but we can come back to that later…….Cats just eat food and then due to the “hair ball” issue they feel the need to throw up.   The catch is that they throw when and where they most likely think it will inconvenience you. 

It’s as if they communicate amongst themselves. “Copy pussycat one we have a new, fluffy, green rug in the bathroom completely untarnished.  All systems are go!”  “Roger that pussycat two I’m on it.  I can plop a big, fat, wet hairball on that one pronto and no one will be the wiser.  Meow out!”  Within moments you walk into the bathroom and your clean rug has been soiled and the cat is just sitting there with this innocent look on its face as if he did nothing.  It slays me!  They never hit the hardwood floors or the kitchen floor; no they hit the rugs, a garment lying on the floor, papers on the floor; always something that has to be scrubbed, washed or majorly cleaned!

It’s the evil plot to ruin things in the house, but they have this innocent look on their face as if they truly love you and all they need to do is purr up next to you and all will be forgiven!  You cat lovers know what I’m talking about right?  Still, I love my cats and regardless of their evil plots I still give them unconditional love.  Throughout my many years as a cat lover I have won over some hearts that many thought couldn’t be won.  I have tamed a few wild ones and shown them the love.  The boys are the easiest to win over; it’s the girls that are just pure evil; guess that’s no surprise huh?

If you’re thinking of getting a cat for the first time just remember to keep a lot of cleaning supplies on hand, but remember in the end they are worth it.  One sweet purr when your down and out makes it all worth while!

posted by EmpressSassy on Apr 30

As women,we are romantics at heart; we are drawn to the forever happy ending.  We long to be sought after by the rescuer who will come along and take us away and give us our fairy tale ending.  I’m always fascinated to know love has been around for centuries in the same capacity as it is today. 

Jane Austin not only writes of love in the 1700’s, but she also lived a life of heartbreak and tragedy in her own life.  She loved a man; one man and gave her heart to him only.  When she realized to love him would deprive his family of wealth and substance she released him and sent him away only to be alone the rest of his life.  She never loved again and it was stated he never stopped loving her as well.  He even named his first born child after her - Jane. 

She went on to write several classic novels all with happy endings and was quoted as saying that all her characters may suffer trials and tribulations, but each would end up with a happy ending because she wanted her characters to have true happiness in her novels.  She was a true romantic at heart.

Women are strong and I will state her confidently that women are far stronger than men mentally and emotionally.  I am 5 generations into the females of my family and they are a strong breed.  I have seen them endure so much throughout their 70+ years and it’s truly amazing.  Love has played a major part with most of these events.  Love can make you do many things.  Love for a man or a child can lift your spirits like a cloud in the sky or break you like a branch in a horrible storm.   I have also watched these women fight against each other and stand firm with each other.  Against, it’s a battle of wills - standing firm it’s a force unstoppable when played out perfectly. 

Love can cause mistakes, regrets, anguish, financial loss, tears, but it can also cause happiness, security and peace of mind.  it’s the one word that truly can’t be explained can it?  You can tie emotions around it, but people handle it so differently.   You know I love the statement, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved.”  I find that to be so true as I wouldn’t change my past at all.  Yes, in the end when you lose someone it can be painful, but the “during” was worth it.

Love was, is and always will be a mystery, but it is a mystery worth solving.  It’s just an intriguing, intoxicating, mysterious part of our lives.  If your teetering on taking the plunge; go for it!  Take a chance!  It’s not so bad!

posted by EmpressSassy on Apr 15

As you know I gave up caffeine and I thought it would be tragic.  Turns out I’m not an addict to caffeine, I’m an addict to carbonation.  Yes, it’s true I can’t live without carbonation in my life.  I have to feel those little bubbles burning the back of my throat to get my world started in the morning. 

I realized this when I tried to drink water (what is up with you water drinking people?  This is just boring as life can get) and things like lemonade, Kool-Aid, etc.  It just wasn’t doing anything for me.  At first I thought it was the lack of caffeine, but then I realized it was the need for the fizz.  I live for the fizz!

My day is without purpose if I can’t have the fizz so now I have Ginger Ale, Sprite and Root Beer, but I still have the fizz in my life.  It’s a win/win and I have still given up the caffeine.   I don’ t drink that many, maybe two a day so for the most part I fill in the rest with that dreaded water substance, but still how do people live without fizz in their life?  I dare say I will never know!  I’m an addict and that is just that!  No fizz no happiness; that’s all I’m saying!