Empress Sassy

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 30

I had to share this.  It was on the web under NFLonFOXSports.  It cracked me up.  Please read, it’s a letter to Brett Favre:

Wow. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Not since you gift-wrapped the 2007 NFC Championship for the New York Giants has someone felt this indebted to you. (Grateful Giants fans should always remember that there couldn’t have been David Tyree without your ill-advised floater to Corey Webster.)

Like a lot of my weary pals, I just couldn’t have faced another season of the Ol’ Gunslinger. I didn’t have the legs for it.

My cell phone ringing, seeing it’s the home office calling, fearing they’re going to ask for a Favre column. It’s no way to live.

I was tapped out. Even John Madden, the Ol’ Gunslinger’s No. 1 fan, couldn’t bring himself back for more when it looked very much like you’d be saddling up once again.

So this is it. The goodbye at the end of the very long goodbye.

I know you won’t miss me, a guy who went on national television last summer and announced that Aaron Rodgers would have a better QB rating than you would. (He did and it wasn’t really close, 93.8 to 81.0.)

Even though we had some good times, I guess I won’t miss you either. True, I was never that into you, except for that elegiac Monday night in Oakland (hey, I’m not made of stone). But the tedium of your annual summer decision-making paralysis has lowered you from slightly overrated in my book to unbearable dinner guest who won’t leave.

Until now. Did I thank you for finally leaving?

By calling it quits before donning Viking purple, you have hewed to the law of Hall of Fame QBs who hung on one stop too long. Unitas in Charger powder blue. Namath as a Ram. And now Brett the Jet.

Had you hung on two stops too long it would have muddied the effect. Depending on how badly things went in Minny people might have forgotten how miserably they ended in New York, where you finished your season there as the NFL’s 21st-rated passer (behind Seneca Wallace, Trent Edwards and Jason Campbell).

With your better-late-than-never announcement I feel we finally have some closure. So I am enclosing some of those stats I won’t be needing to trot out anymore. You should have them. After all, they belong to you (or your courageous successor in Green Bay).

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 26

Want to just go completely insane?  You’re right, most people don’t, but when you stare at paint samples for more than 30 minutes it can happen. 

Let’s face it, you only have so many choices on the color wheel; blue, green, yellow, red, orange, neutral or some bizarre color that I just can’t do.

I already have a lot of yellow and green in my house so when I went downstairs I tried to branch out.  Noah has blue in his room so blue was out.  It’s a basement so you have to keep it bright.  I ended up with neutral in one room, yellow in the big room (Noah’s favorite of course) so the third room I wanted something different.  You stare at these colors for ever and it just makes your head spin because they all look the same.

I went for an orange color finally so it would blend with my yellow room.  It was just the laundry room, but it’s a big room.  The color card looked nice, but when you paint the wall it did NOT look the same.  It just looked like a Bayor Aspirin!  Yep that is what the wall looked like in my laundry room.  Do I care?  Nope, not really.  It’s not the end of the world, it IS different and I’m too tired to make the change. 

I have primed walls until I can’t see straight, my elbows and shoulders ache beyond words and I have paint in places I shouldn’t have paint!  I just want to move past painting!  I want to get to other things.  I want to hang pictures, move furniture, get things organized.  I will be painting until the end of time!

I just have to thank goodness I don’t have to pick out any more colors.  It just makes you crazy to stare at the cards and see how they all look the same, but yet they don’t.  It’s crazy.  So many shades of one color!

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 23

There is nothing worse than being out somewhere and hearing your name yelled across the room…..you don’t recognize the voice at first and then you turn, “dang, it’s that person from your past that you really just could have missed and not cared at all.”  However, for whatever reason fate has thrust them in your face and you begin the exchanges; How are you, what have you been up too, where do you work now, and then the clincher, “We SO need to get together and do lunch or dinner, OK?”  Do they really mean it or is it something they just say?

Some do and some don’t.  Here is the thing; I’m told on more than one occasion that I’m “unsocial” because I don’t go out with a lot of people or mingle with various groups.  Here is my explanation for about the 100th time.  There are so many hours in a day, so many days in a week and so many weeks in a year.  When you work 8 hours a day, 5 days a week that sucks up a lot of time right there.  Then you throw in responsibilities such as kids, household chores, outside chores, church, school events, family events, etc you are losing time each day. 

The small amount of free time you have I try to split it between my family, good friends and sometimes I get crazy and I want time to myself.  I certainly don’t want to spend time with someone that I really don’t have a huge investment in nor am I really that close to in my life.  I guess my point in a very black and white attitude is that if we can’t truly benefit from one another aren’t we wasting each other’s time?

I also loathe those people that pretend you are the bad guy in a social situation where they KNOW they have did something “shady”, for lack of a better word and you have parted ways.  Now me, I have learned to just let people go - out of sight, out of mind.  Co-workers for example, I work with them and unless I have connected with them on a deep level (and it happens - Jacob, Traci!) then I don’t have to keep in touch and hang out.  If someone leaves the company I say good-bye and believe it or not I do wish them well.  That doesn’t mean I’m obligated to see them in 3 months, 6 months, etc. unless I would want to.  What I loathe is when they tell other people that I don’t like them for some crazy reason or they “know” the reason I’m not talking to them.  Trust me, if they do know that should tell the other people right there the truth.  Most of the time I just don’t really have time, nor do I care any longer. 

I’m not unsocial, if anything I’m the exact opposite, but here is the thing, it’s with my close friends and my family.  What is wrong with that?  I’m not into big, huge parties that I don’t know people, nor do I go places where I know people don’t really like me.  I don’t like hypocrites!  When I do want to have fun I have fun.  Unsocial is a word people use against me when I don’t do something they want me to do.  It cracks me up.

For those that judge, please continue because you know how much that makes me value you as a person.  Says a lot for your character too!  For me, I will continue to be me and I don’t expect anything from this group of people.  I am good to my close friends and family and in return I expect the same from them.  It works for me and I’m not real sure I care what others think, oh wait I know I don’t care!

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 23

Home repairs are great and don’t get me wrong I love doing them, but there is always a catch.  You start to clean up one area and all it does it make the other areas look old and tarnished.  Then you begin to think to yourself, well now I need the old to match the new! 

My basement is starting to take shape and once we put the floor down it will be this grand place; a place to lounge, play, relax and people will just say, “Oh how nice!  However, my upstairs is almost two years old so the paint is just getting old and now I feel like I need to refresh!  I am getting new windows and hopefully that will brighten the upstairs but now I feel like I need to do a complete overhaul to match the downstairs. 

It’s never ending when you own a home and it’s exhausting.  I’m not obsessive about it I promise, but I do want it to look nice.  I guess it’s just one project at a time and I’ll live with it.  I can’t fathom painting another room, yet I did watch a video at Home Depot the other day on this really cool finish that I would love to try in my bedroom.  I know I said I needed to marry a plumber, but I would love for him to love painting on the side!  ha ha. 

Anyway, I intend to just move along improving one room at a time!

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 23

How funny is this?  A friend at work sent this around and it cracked me up.   Don’t you wish you owned one? 

I know I do!  I would be stamping it on everything; work and personal!  How many times a day do you say this in your head?  People just crack me up and seriously it would be great to just stamp it on foreheads too? 

How about car windows when they park like idiots?  How about people’s shirts when they are in the express lane and they have 30 items?  So many uses; so little time!!

It would so get many of us fired at work because you know you’d be stamping it all over the place right?  It’s just too easy sometimes to want to say it out loud, but you can’t.  How about anonymous stampings?  How great would that be?  You could leave a note saying, “You’ve been stamped by the WTF Bandit so get your SH** together!”   That would be awesome.

I may have to seriously just order one of these and have it on hand for moments of stupidity!  If I get a buy one get one free deal I’ll let you guys know!

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 20

This was another cute place and it’s about a mile down the road, in the opposite direction from the hotel.  It’s a little house, well building shaped like a castle and they sell candy and Christmas decorations.  It’s not over-the-top wonderful, but if you have kids it’s a cute place to stop buy and buy some fun things. 

It’s great for candy purchases and all the candy is made locally and it’s homemade, even the candy canes.  They have the old fashioned candy too.  I’m not a big candy person, but if you are, then this is a great place for you to visit. 

It’s located at 15499 N. State Road 245, which is one mile South of Holiday World. Actuall when you’re coming into Holiday World you vere to the left and go about a mile and it’s on the left.  The website is http://www.santascandycastle.com/ so check it out.  It’s a cute place!

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 20

We stayed at the Santa Lodge this past weekend and well, first of all let me say how nice it is to leave Holiday World and drive across the street to rest.  I know it’s only an hour drive, but how nice to just check in around 9:00 and have the rest of the night to just relax.  It was great.

This is an older hotel, probably the original hotel in the town, so although quaint, it’s not fancy.  It is however, filled with holiday cheer!  It has an indoor and an outdoor pool and it’s a huge hotel.  It holds a ton of guest.  The place was packed too so they are taking in the holiday dough! 

They have a restaurant and bar and there is also a cute place across the street called Frosty’s Fun Place that has snack foods and a mini-golf course.  It was a fun night just hanging out.  Again, it was nice not to have to go home. Check out isn’t until 11:00 so you can relax the next morning, have some breakfast and even swim again if you want to and you can also swim after you check out.

It was a pretty decent place to stay if you ever want to spend the night.  It’s right across the street, you just take a right from the park and it’s an immediate left.  You can’t miss the sign and the huge Santa Claus in the parking lot.

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 17

Isn’t it always sad to see something develop right in front of your eyes that you knew was going to happen?  Sort of the, “I told you so syndrome” and even though you knew it was going to happen, out of respect you just can’t say anything to the person.

I honestly have come to realize that people just get caught up  in their lives and they are just too close to the situation.  I’ve done it and when that happens it’s like you know the bus is coming, you can see the bus coming and you even know the bus is going to hit you, but for some reason you just CAN’T get out of the road.  The signs flash, the horns blare, people yell at you, but still you just stand in the middle of the street.  It’s amazing too; once the bus grazes you, then and only then do you wake up and get out of the way and run from the bus for good. 

Life is funny,  guess we learn from mistakes (well the smart people anyway) and this, for some reason makes us smarter and stronger.  Humans are just a stranger breed and in the end I guess we’ve all learned the hard way.  It’s just tough to watch someone learn these lessons when you know you could have helped them if they would just look up and see the bus!

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 17

Is this true?  Did I miss something or is Indiana just behind the fashion trends?  Everywhere I turn a kid is still wearing Crocs.  Granted, I do see kids wearing flip-flops too, but honestly Crocs are everywhere from 6 months old to my age!  I don’t get this article.

Crocs were born of the economic boom.

posted by EmpressSassy on Jul 15

Brett Favre acknowledged he’s “running out of time” to decide whether he’ll play for the Minnesota Vikings this season.

The quarterback told The Associated Press on Wednesday that he’ll give the Vikingsan answer on whether he’ll play by the July 30 start of training camp. Favre has been working out with the Oak Grove High School football team three days a week all summer, but added a Sunday workout this week.

“There’s two weeks left and I’m doing everything I can,” Favre said. “I was down here Sunday morning working out. I’m trying to get everything to where I feel 100 percent when I go in. I can’t go in any less. When you’re 39 years old, it’s hard enough. But it’s getting there.”

OMG!  Really, really, truly, is this happening again?  It’s like the Brett Favre show every, single, season.  It’s like, “Hey who wants the old man this year?”  I love how he is putting a deadline on his decision.  Why, as to not drag out the drama? Really?  You ARE the drama just for coming back again.

Please let it end!  This man is a complete joke.  Just retire to your corn field and let it go.  He seriously needs counseling.