posted by EmpressSassy on Mar 28
While Jacob was having dinner with his “people” we discussed cheating. We always seem to jump to various topics and some how we jumped to this particular topic. Gee I can’t seem to remember why…………Anyway…………..
So what is considered cheating? First of all I have been cheated on and I have cheated so I know the ramifications of both and although I’m not proud of when I did cheat, it happens and thus is life. I do take responsibility and when you look back, no matter whatever the reason it isn’t the right thing to do. OK, well when I was younger I can justify it, but that was another lifetime and we won’t go there.
Anyway (again), Jacob actually said some things that cracked me up. First of all, if you are in a committed relationship and you are talking to someone else, seeing someone else, receiving emails, letters, phone calls from someone else then I hate to tell you my friend, but you are cheating on that person. If you actually say, “Well I think that person might be cheating on me too!” What is that comment? What are you in that relationship for anyway? That is pathetic? What if you say, “Well he is mean to me, but I just can’t leave him for the kids?” How many times do we hear that one? It’s still cheating!
Cheating is cheating and no matter how you break it down, you can’t justify it. You can find a friend that will allow you to justify it and when you do that tends to make you feel better, but you are still cheating. If that works for you then that’s fine, but guess what? Still cheating!
If you have never been in a relationship then you really just don’t understand where cheating can go and what it can do to a relationship and in that case, you really can’t debate it or discuss it; as you don’t understand.
At the end of the day, if you are cheating on your significant other and they don’t know it then they are the one that is being hurt. That other person is being lied to, cheated on and made to look the fool. Cheating is wrong. We are human, it happens and you can move on from it and get past it, but you have to know it’s wrong. You can’t justify it and expect others to just say, “OK yes it’s OK what you are doing.”
I have did that and at the end of the day you must come back and admit, it’s wrong. What do you consider cheating? If you spouse were to have lunch with a member of the opposite sex every day and share personal information about their life, would you consider that cheating? Would you allow them to continue to have these “lunch dates”? Do you trust them enough? If that same person began to call them at home would you nip it? What do you consider cheating?
March 28th, 2009 at 10:15 pm
I think cheating is exactly what you have said. It doesn’t have to include kissing or sex. I think emotional cheating is worse (speaking frome experience here). If your “partner” is talking to someone of the opposite sex once or more a day, texting all the time, sharing info that is wayyyyyy too personal, it is cheating.
Someone was telling me that for a woman, it is worse to be emotionally cheated on and they (we) can get over physical cheating easier. For men, physically cheating is harder to get over than emotional cheating. That all makes sense. But both are cheating. Period.
March 28th, 2009 at 10:53 pm
Traci, I couldn’t have said it better myself. Well put!
March 28th, 2009 at 11:05 pm
I also couldn’t agree more and I can’t imagine anyone NOT agreeing, well except someone that is in the process of cheating and can’t think straight OR someone that hasn’t been in a relationship. Or you may have someone that is trying to justify for a friend. Still, at the end of the day cheating is cheating. Again, humans do human things but you have to realize it is what it is and it’s wrong. You can’t make up reasons to make it right.